Dear Roommates:
You're sitting in the kitchen right now complaining about how you don't know anyone except for "our boys". Well. Get off your butts and go meet people. There is no rule that you can only talk to them. Be brave, make cookies or something, and go find boys that you want to be friends with. Be bold, and go hang out in some random guys building (not the one in our ward). There are at least 10 boys buildings in Heritage. Pick one. Maesar. Shipp. Smith. Snow. Broadbent. Kimball. and a few others that I don't remember. There are a few more buildings in Helaman, boys in Wyview... and have you ever heard of off-campus housing? Meet people. Don't just sit in our kitchen complaining. Do something about it. To quote something you just said... "if it's a big enough deal to complain about it, do something about it"
There are 54 other girls in this building. Do you know them? No. Do you know our next door neighbors? Only the two that visit teach you. Maybe start there. The guys in our ward will pretty much all (minus Tim and Cory) be on missions by the end of next semester. Meet the girls. Be friends with them. You could have so much fun with them, our building is AMAZING. When I see the girls from my building last year I am embarrassed that I recognize their faces but have no clue what some of their names are. You will see them again, whether you want to believe it or not.
You're complaining that "our boys" don't give their #4 roommate a chance. You have no clue what they are going through with him. You only hear part of the story, you only see some of it. Give them a little credit. Also, what about one of our roommates. Do you give her a chance? Have you written her off?
Put aside your thoughts of what BYU would be like. Everybody doesn't know everybody. Not everyone is best friends. Not everyone is perfect. Some people are unhappy. Some are depressed. Some aren't the "good mormons" you were expecting. Move on! Accept that we're all different and that there will be people you don't agree with and like.
You complain about getting sick, and not getting good grades. Try going to sleep before 3am. I promise it works wonders when you get sleep. Don't sleep too much, but get more sleep than you have been. Staying up til 4 doing homework really doesn't help you. I've done it before, it doesn't work. Eat real food. Remember that plan to work out? Why not actually try it? It may help you too. You might just feel a little better if you're not just sitting around all day. I know it's helping me.
Don't waste time being lame. The semester is almost over. Our time here is just about halfway done. Before you know it, we'll all be going home. Make the most of our time. We say goodbye to one of "our boys" in a month. Are you ready for that? It's hard, I'll warn you. I've been through it. You won't realize until he's gone just how much you enjoyed being with him. Make the most of your freshman year here. You only get one shot at it. You don't have to be best friends with each other, don't try to be. Be friends though. Please.
Most importantly. Be yourself. You are talking about how you haven't felt like yourself here. Maybe you should start with that. Be yourself and you'll probably have an easier time making friends. People can and do see through you and know you're not being you.
Love, your roommate.
5 comments:
Oh my gosh! I just realized what my letter to my roommates would've said and it was scary!
: O
You go Marci. That was so chill.
amen marce. you are so wise. I really think you should share that with them, because that would be tragic if they really go through their freshman year not understanding what they can do and what experiences they can have if they only open up as themselves and get to know everyone they can. what you have written is true doctrine my dear.
You are one wise young woman. I agree with Megan that you ought to send them all a link to your blog. Or else you should print it and tape a copy to each of their bedroom doors! If you don't like what's happening, you are the only one who can change yourself! I so agree with you. See you next week!
I think you're next calling will be Relief Society President. I have half a mind to copy your letter and send it annonymously to over half the girls in my Relief Society.
On another note: Have a Happy Thanksgiving next week!
Just so everyone knows. I didn't print the letter, but one of the girls started complaining to me so I basically went through everything from the letter with her. I doubt she'll do anything with the advice I gave, but now she can't complain to me anymore because she knows how I feel about it. :)
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